Sunday, January 29, 2006

Which Kyewt Animal Are You?



This is me. A lilttle baby monkey.

As determined by pretty much the best quiz ever.

I'm off to swing from tree to tree.

Peace.

Happy 4704! Woof.



Kung hei fat choy!
4704
Year of the Dog
May it be a prosperous and smooth one for all.....
Dogs are the most beloved animals in the Chinese zodiac.
There are fifteen days of celebration for the New Year, beginning today.
Last night at a little Lunar NY Eve party, I had my astrological chart read. I am "metal." The colors I should surround myself with are white and gold. I should wear a lot of jewelry to keep my metal flowing. That suits me just fine....
Eat dumplings!

Friday, January 27, 2006

Chocolate: The Guide for Boys



When you hear all that stuff about chocolate being better than sex, and see all those cartoons and tourist tees with pathetic women dreaming of chocolate and blah blah blah...well, they're all based on real stuff. We like chocolate. Sometimes it is better than sex. And when we get our period we want it even more than we usually do. Here's my point: it, along with other things, is the way or perhaps I should say, a very solid way to a girl's heart. It's always a good gift. It's a REALLY good gift if you don't eat any of it and you watch us eat it ALL without saying a word. Muah!

With V-day coming up, I thought I'd give you a rundown of good choices for your lady. Just say no to Whitman's Samplers. Also, 1lb minimum - no little four piece box.

From top to bottom:

Fauchon - for the Princess. Straight up.
Vosges - for the truffle lovah or design snob.
MarieBelle - for the LES lady who owns her own apartment.
Li-lac - for the West Vil girl with a soft side.

If you're in Cali....

It's See's. Delicious all, every and anytime.

Can you guess which one I want?

Here's a hint: it's pink.

Rody



I ran into Rody at Richard's house recently. I was handed a hot toddy in a kyewt mug with what I believe was his likeness. Hmmmmm...he looked familiar, but I didn't know his name. You know what that means: let the compulsive researching begin.

These lovable little horsies are children's toys. From the '80s. Push Rody's little rubber feet into a base and he's a rocking horse, take him off the base and he's for hopping around the house on. Sweeeeet. Check it here (so much kyewter than pukey yoga balls...speaking of which, when's Murakami gonna lace one?)

The Japanese have gotten their kyewt-loving paws all over the Rody license (from Italy, I think) and now churn out phone charms (seen here), Pyrex ware and all sorts of Rodyproducts.

I love the heart on his head and his little spotted sides.

When I was little I used to make myself sick on the Sit 'n' Spin. I also had a big horse, like a carousel horse on a frame with springs that sister would wil' out on.

18K


I got this sparkler in the mail today. Ebay. Tres kyewt!

I am so loving 18K yellow gold right now. A girl, I mean, WOMAN, can only handle so much 10, heck even "14" Karat from the hood for so long. Gold fill, even worse.

Of course if ever faced with a choice, it's gotta be 24K, but because it's so soft you can't really set stones and go all out. Of course you can do a chain, a charm, a band...and they're GOOD. Don't be afraid of the yellow, Americans...it's the hot shit. Real rekanize real.

Gold is currently trading off the charts...you gotta be ballin, or dumb, to buy it pure right now. Just a heads up, in case you head to Canal St for New Year festivities and get hypnotized by the dangling chains in all the windows...mmmmm.

Monday, January 23, 2006

Kyewt Porn

CLAW says baby animals are like porn for girls.

She found this money shot after typing "baby bunny" into google images.

Onion booty, baby bunnies, tomayto, tamahto - same thing. All NOT work.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Ponies


Sparkle-Pony and Cool Breeze emailed CLAW and me about The Pony Project. They are desperado for anything related to it. Claw's pony was soooooo kyewt. What a night.

Sparkle-Pony and Cool Breeze are a mother daughter duo from Tatum, Texas and are cuckoo for Hasbro's My Little Pony. I found this picture on their homepage along with lots and lots of information, weirdness and la kyewt. They explain:

"Here we have many fanciful BABY animals. Yes, these are also My Little Pony items. They are called; My Little Pony Friends and Pretty Pals. There is a dinosaur named Cutesaurus, an elephant (Edgar), a calf (Leafy), panda (Nectar), moose, (Oakly) Llama (ChaCha), kangaroo (Hoppy), lamb (Wooly), and even kittens, and rabbits. The kittens and rabbits come from sets called, Li'l Litters. The Moose and the Llama range from $20 - $40. See the pink, small item in the middle? That is a My Little Pony Charm. Some of these go for over $25. These were only available from McDonalds in the St. Louis Missouri area in 1984. Many people think these are bookmarks. There are six different charms."

Ohhhhhh ChaCha the Llama.
Ohhhhhh Nectar, with your baby blue markings.
Sigh.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Piedmont Boutique

Powerhouse Sara and I had lunch the other day and rattled off a kajillion 80s fashion trends we loved. Then somehow, we bonded over our love for Piedmont -- the Haight/Ashbury institution filled with more earrings, hair clips, glittery tights, bangle bracelets and super-fly junky accessories than you could ever dream of.

She told me that they make everything there, which is mind-boggling. You have to see the amount of stuff they have to truly understand this -- we're talking a WALL of earrings, people. Glitter tights dip-dyed in 30 hues. It doesn't stop...

She also told me they sell on the web. I don't need it -- earrings cost like 5 bux, but I managed to drop close to 200 last month. But should you need it, go crazy and relive your middle school earring fantasies here.

Mimoco Mimobots


USB drives.

Do I even need to write anything?

Oh yes I do.....their butts light up when ya plug 'em in. Yesssssss.

These epitomize la kyewt all day.

Canned Coffee


A can of coffee with a free toy topper is my idea of kyewt.

Walking alone in the back streets of Shibuya a few years ago, past love hotels and strange little restaurants in the rain, I came face to face with four, humming, illuminated hot coffee machines and just standing there with them felt comforting.

You plonk your coins in and choose. Which brand/can/flavor to choose proves challenging when you don't speak Japanese, sure. Will it be hot? Will it have milk? Sugar? You take a good guess and press a button. The can rolls down. Pop the top and you're sipping on a little bit of steamy heaven. Mmmmmm the universal language of coffee and love. YUM!

I found this website, cannedcoffee.com which may help me the next time I'm in the presence of one of those wonderful machines. Reviews of canned coffee, ranging from longwinded and literary to short and snappy, are here, posted by writers of all varieties. The site has some sort of coffee-journal-late-night-insane-fest-on-paper for sale. There's also an ode to coffee by Balzac on the homepage. You gotta love that. The site is hosted by Chin Music Press, the Japan/Seattle-based publishing house devoted to creating books as objets. Nice stuff!

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Barbapapa




Parisienne Annette Tilson met Frisco kid and expat Talus Taylor in France and made kyewt history when they created and published the first Barbapapa book in 1970. Tilson and Taylor are married, live in Paris and still churn out out Barbagoodness.

Barbapapa grow out of the ground and are squishy, amorphous shape shifters. They can turn into anything - ferris wheels, stairways, musical instruments, houses, letters, heck....anything. The big pink one is the Barbapapa, his lady is the all black Barbamama and together they have seven Barbababies, all with distinct and lovable personalities.

The Barbas became cult favorites through countless books published in many languages and a shortlived, Netherlands-produced animated series in the 70s. In newly produced Japanese merchandise (yes the Japanese are ALWAYS on it) Barbapapas are still out there living it up.

I had these books when I was young and was always obsessed with their originality and squeal-inducing illustrations. I really wanted more than anything to go chill with these guys, if only for a little while. They always had a great time, even when dealing with adversity. Shape shifting solves so many problems. Need to go to the Riviera? I'll be a boat and let's go!

When I was in Japan, I picked up Barbapapa toe separators for pedicures. They make Barbapapa everything over there. If you're in the states, you can shop Kid Robot for the occasional import.

Hit up the official Barbawebsite for Barbagames and a most excellent Barbababyscreensaver.

Pencil Caps


I found these vintage sweeties up for acution online. Sanrio, of course. Circa 1978.

Remember the days when something as simple as a kyewt pencil cap made your day? You could just go find an ugly old pencil, transform it, whip out a piece of paper and scribble your name over and over, watch the new pencil cap bob around.

Yeah.

Glad to know my good friends over at Sax-X are still churning out some sweet ones.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Dog Portraits


Well, I'm a cat person, but this portraitess is pretty great! Her name is Alexis and she's a NYC local. Cool. I particularly like this English bulldog imagined as a fish. I often imagine my cat as a bunny rabbit.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Vintage Stickers




Oh wow.

I can't even get started here...

I got them on eBay with hundreds more in a mega lot and I could cry tears of nostalgic joy.

Expect more on vintage stickers in future posts, cuz I got lots to say.

Hagen-Renaker Minis



Founded almost by accident in 1945 by a husband and wife duo, Hagen-Renaker makes handcrafted ceramic figurines. They make a ton of horses that people go ga-ga for, and also produced Disney collectibles for many years. Most appealing to my kyewt sensibility are these miniatures. The San Dimas, California-based company has new release and retired figures every year.

Sister was big on miniatures back in the day. When visiting my grandma in Frisco, we'd troop a few blocks down in the Sunset district to a little Chinese-run gift shop and she'd go crazy over itty bitty foodstuffs, brass lamps or household utensils and the like, for her setup back home.

Being the older sister with no dollhouse, I'd buy a few of these little guys.

Averaging about an inch, they still come on small pieces of paper printed with the instructions "to remove - soak in water" -- which I can't remember ever following. I'll have to rummage through the archives at mom and dad's to see if they have little paper pads on their paws.

Friday, January 06, 2006

Tobias Wong



Tobias Wong is great. At first I was hesitant to really like his stuff, because I can be a hater. But at the end of the day, I'm a lover.

Image 1: From his collabo with Ju$t Another Rich Kid, gold pills to make your poo sparkle. Available HERE for $275

Image 2: Pearl earrings dipped in a fondue of matte black industrial rubber.

Also, he has a Jenny Holzer tattoo. Teeheehee.

Pretty Kyewt, guy.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Ron Rege for Letter Pressed



For all the stationery I have, I write so few letters. But when I pay my rent, it's always in a nice envelope and sealed with a dope sticker.

Being a stationery/sticker fiend and daughter of an art director (many days after school were spent making runs with mom to "Auggie the printer"), I definitely get giddy over a good print job. Letterpress is sublime. The heads at Letter Pressed agree. They are making some kyewt stuff...

This artist series card by Ron Rege Jr. is cool. he's an artist who recently made some toys for Tylenol's far-reaching, hipster-wooing marketing push called Ouch! Get that paper, kid!

Emily & Ashley


I remember when these girls used to make beaded bracelets. They've really stepped it up with some gold kyewtness. Frankly though, their agent, Fragments has been slippin' over the past few years.

For anyone who wants to buy me something, I will take this and love you for it.

Thanks in advance.

Are Teeth The New Owls?!

CLAW,

Are teeth the new hot shit?

The new fawn? Owl? Seagull?

I swear I didn't know.

Love,
TEEF1

Chompers

I can't decide what word is the Kyewtest:

MOLAR
TOOF
TEEF
TEEFS

I am trying to chose a gender neutral moniker.

Teeth are very precious. When you loose one (as an adult) it is tha worst eva.

Please leave me a feedback message with your choice of the above, or perhaps another one altogether.

Gabriel Urist



Big ups to my new friend Gabriel Urist. His itsy bitsy teeny weenie precious little sneaks are so cute I can't take my eyes of of them. I copped a diamond studded one for my honey for his birthday and looking at it...I just have to squeal to myself, every time. So much better than the real ones in lifesize 12. Tiny perfection.

Animus by Seonna Hong



One more book post for the day, before I go blind.

I got this book at Kinokuniya after reading about Ms. Hong in GR (props to them for keeping the AA pop culture rockin'). She's married to Tim Biskup. You've seen his work everywhere.

The book is sweet as a flower. The paintings are lovely. I just want to squeeze the protagonist's teeny, chubby legs. The poetic text is so-so, but the overall theme of life's gray areas, stumbling blocks and ups and downs is thoroughly conveyed though Hong's art. Mysterious, chilly, innocent, lovey, lonely, vintage-y feeling work.

You can't go wrong with a pop-up book. "Moving Picture," as it is called here. Whatever. KYEWT!

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

MUJI & MIES

Muji is great. As clean as they keep it, they still manage to sneak in the kyewt. Check out the little "City in the Bag" toys they made 'specially for Xmas 2005. Wait, Xmas in Japan? Well, they love to shop and it's a time to be kind and full of cheer! Reason enough to release special product for consumption.

I am loving MME. Liberty and the Guggenheim -- dope of them to chose that. And is that the Seagram building or just any plain ol' building? I"ll pretend it's the Seagram. I likey. When I was a schoolgal I went there and asked the doorman if they had any literature for people to take away. He looked at me like I was crazy. I was just being studious. I wonder if they ever got that together. Perhaps there's no demand, but with the rise in popularity of say, the Barcelona furniture collection, you'd think peeps would inquire. It is such a beauty.

We could never have a store like Muji with comparable presence here in the US. We're just too tacky. Something about our youth and naivete...if you've ever been to Ryoan-ji...you know? We're just not that deep. They do everything we do, but differently. I won't say better. We're a little wild, so splintered, so individualistic, so in love with plastic. We have Walmart. Sigh and eew.

The three pack of camisoles I bought at Muji more than ten years ago are still in great shape. That's pretty nice.

"Best quality," as my sister and I say.

HUGE NEWS IN KYEWTLAND!


The Grey Lady has spoken. Yesterday's NYTimes. The Science section. Omg.
"THE CUTE FACTOR"
Some highlights:

A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS
"New studies suggest that cute images stimulate the same pleasure centers of the brain aroused by sex, a good meal or psychoactive drugs like cocaine"

UM, DUH
"Experts point out that the cuteness craze is particularly acute in Japan, where it goes by the name "kawaii" and has infiltrated the most masculine of redoubts."

OH WE ARE SO EVOLVED YET SO SIMPLE
"As a species whose youngest members are so pathetically helpless they can't lift their heads to suckle without adult supervision, human beings must be wired to respond quickly and gamely to any and all signs of infantile desire. The human cuteness detector is set at such a low bar, researchers said, that it sweeps in and deems cute practically anything remotely resembling a human baby or a part thereof, and so ends up including the young of virtually every mammalian species, fuzzy-headed birds like Japanese cranes, woolly bear caterpillars, a bobbing balloon, a big round rock stacked on a smaller rock, a colon, a hyphen and a close parenthesis typed in succession." (THAT LAST BIT IS A CHEAP SHOT :-) )

I AM SO CUTE
"Cuteness is distinct from beauty, researchers say, emphasizing rounded over sculptured, soft over refined, clumsy over quick. Beauty attracts admiration and demands a pedestal; cuteness attracts affection and demands a lap. Beauty is rare and brutal, despoiled by a single pimple. Cuteness is commonplace and generous, content on occasion to cosegregate with homeliness."

LASTLY, Mad props to writer Natalie Angier for her MEGA KYEWT description of le sea cow:
"many Floridians have an enormous affection for the manatee, which looks like an overfertilized potato with a sock puppet's face"

Here's the entire article.

Manatees are the bomb.

Pictoplasma 2




Pictoplasma 2, the second edition of the coffee table tome devoted to characters, is on sale on the Urban Outfitters website for ninenineeenine...sweet! That's a 45 dollar discount. Whether you're interested in characters as commercial branding tools or ya just want to leaf through 216 pages of KYEWTNESS (I fall somewhere in between), this book's for you. I've been waiting, waiting, waiting for it to go on sale. Bought that and a pair of argyle tights on clearance. Dooooope.

Junko Mizuno

I tore through Pure Trance, the graphic novel (first translated into English) by one of my very favorite artists, Junko Mizuno over the holiday break. I'm a fan of her twisted, feminist, sexy, perverted and mega kyewt illustrating, and though her revisionist fairy tales were awesome, they were short and printed on newspaper-y print and I wanted more. Pure Trance is great. It's long and meaty and the story goes a little something like this:

Underground society, no food just pills, disorder called Hyperorexia where ladies stuff themselves full of said pills, hospital to treat them run by a crazy, drug addict witch. Sexy nurses who actually care about the patients don't know what to do. More sexy nurses who are man-made beat up on the real nurses. Escape from the hospital. Chasing. A hot, smart n' sexy explorer chick. Riding around on giant fluffy dogs with long ears. Teddy bears that you hide things in. Lots of meat eating. Super cute dresses, headbands, boots and heart shaped panties. Ahhhhhhh....what a girl wants, indeed.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

Sir Theodore Lloyd B.R.


On this first day of the Kyewt blog, I am pleased to introduce my cat, Lloyd (aka Powdered Doughnut aka White Boy aka Goaty Ranks aka The Boy aka Mr. Rabbit). He is the master of my domain and holy shit look at those paws. Little Ugg boots! He is off the cute-o-meter like whoa!

Digital Kyewt




Retro pixel-y digital stuff is so hot right now. I guess it's pretty kyewt. (Sigh).

More on this pink template: I said it looked all faux-tech with these arrows, but Sean suggested they were slightly Dig Dug. See left: now that my friends, is cute.

Sean is Richard's friend who does music direction. Cute job. He is going to remind me to post things here....I have a bad habit of starting things and not finishing them. Not cute.

New Year's resolution #268 - stick with it!
Here's my new favorite KYEWT thing of 2006. See little weeble wobble-ish babies above. They are called Unazukin and they're fairies. They generally live in the woods and are good at listening to your problems.

Hi.

I had to chose the pink blog template. It's kind of annoying and I prefer the plain one that everyone uses, but like, it's pink. And pink is....CUTE! Yay!

Ok, pause. The tone of this entry thusfar is reminding me of this dude who used to make fun of me, shit-talking about my penchant for pink and love of anything small and cute. He loved it of course (how could you not) but playfully ragged on me: "oh, Minya, why don't you get a car and paint it PINK and then put pinstripes on it that are HOT PINK and then have AfroKen on the license plate!?"

I'm starting this blog becuse so much of my time and headspace is devoted to things that are cute. And if you don't know who the abovementioned AfroKen is, well....you should.